Wax Face And Other Stories

Giving myself my shot, beginning of week 2.

I haven't really been updating much on the shots, have I?

Well, here it goes.

I had shot number four last Thursday.  It was as painless as the shots on the first day.  Even the more painful shots aren't that bad, though... shots two and three stung, but they were definitely do-able.  Getting through the skin is not so much of a challenge yet, and it only starts hurting once the needle is maybe 3/4 of an inch in, and not very bad.

So, changes.  Have there been some?  Well, the answer is "yes."  It's been three weeks and five days and my body is clearly at war for my ovaries.  My skin, especially, bounces in condition like a small rubber ball, except this rubber ball exists specifically because it doesn't know whether to trust the T or the E.

So on day two or three I got what I like to call wax face.  It looks kind of like this:

It's mostly on the forehead and the nose although it's on the upper cheeks as well.  That's oil.  That's maybe an hour after washing my face.  It makes the texture of my skin in general look more masculine.  It went away after a while but it happens again after every shot.  So it's definitely a hormonal thing, the same effect that makes adolescents get acne.

Speaking of which, I have that too.  It isn't so much on the face... I get a zit here and there anyway.  It's on my chest and shoulders.  I've been using a body wash for it and it's gone down, but it's still there to a degree that so far is not bothersome.

My voice is changing just a little.  It's mostly noticeable when I try hitting higher registers, like if I'm babytalking the dog or something I'll squeak.  Otherwise it's slightly deeper and raspier, but not in a way that's noticeable if you don't have a real frame of reference (like, if you listen to a video of me talking from pre-T versus one now).  That, like the face, bounces up and down quite a bit.

So that's that for now.

Buy Girl Scout Cookies With Authority

Normally I try to avoid putting stuff that isn't really related to trans men directly on this blog (mostly because I'm aware the other stories I put here tend to be biased in ways I'm not comfortable with), but... well...

Buy Girl Scout cookies this year.  If you don't have other reasons for not doing so, anyway.

It's a good program.  And it's actually girl-centered rather than cis-girl-centered.  It's inclusive.  It's not the Boy Scouts.  Also I worked for them for a long time.

I'm not particularly worried about them, to be honest... the fact is, when that group disbanded to form a different group, they joined the same organization that was created because the Girl Scouts made mention of "God" in the promise optional.  So they were assholes to begin with.

Just saying, buy Girl Scout cookies.

I'm not being self-depreciating, I'm just saying I'm not more legit.

"You're not like her, though."  No, seriously, wait until you hear this.  "I knew her back before she got into all this transguy stuff... she still acts like the same lesbian she always has been, I mean just look at her.  You, you're legit."

What prompted this, and keep in mind this was a long time ago, was the fact that I requested people stop referring to Zachary, probably the first other trans man I ever met in person who I knew was a trans man, as a lesbian and using female pronouns.

Allow me to mention a few things before I continue.  First off, the woman on the far left in this picture from eleven years ago is me:

That is how people knew me for years.  A baggy-clothed butch girl with a pseudo-mullet.

Trans People Are Not Up For LGBT Debate

You  know, I don't want to spend a hell of a lot of time on this because it's just going to frustrate me, but reading the asinine comments in the Advocate about how "Work It" is totally not offensive to trans people because the characters aren't trans people has really gotten to me.

I just want to say that I'm sick of LGB groups acting as if trans people are or should be a subject of debate.

I'm sick of the fact that the Advocate seems not to moderate comments to get rid of cissexist minimizing about how trans people shouldn't be offended by things that are offensive.

I'm sick of the fact that there are lesbian blogs in which it is considered perfectly OK to write nasty hate bile about trans people where it would be considered absolutely appalling to write similar critiques about sexual orientation.

I'm sick of the fact that even Bilerico's Bil Browning seemed to kick and scream in 2009 before he'd take a transphobic article off of his website because it happened to be written by a gay civil rights leader.

I'm sick of the fact that I've had to sit through LGBT meetings where people turn down all ideas for trans inclusion because they aren't "marketable."

I'm sick of the fact that the HRC has actually given people poorly written surveys in order to "prove" their membership doesn't consider our freedoms important and to justify not fighting for trans people equally.

In short, I'm just getting really fucking sick of the fact that it's not just an issue of ignoring us and keeping us invisible,  I'm sick of being a topic of debate.  I am not your topic of debate any more than you should be mine.