I am not a "bio-girl," thank you very fucking much.

So there's this website called QueerSecrets.  It's a Tumblr which is kind of like PostSecret but for queer people, and instead of sending a letter you send a graphic file or something like that.  A rather disproportionate number of the posts on QueerSecrets are from FTM transfolk.  That's just an aside, actually.

There's a reason I don't subscribe to it.  And that's because of posts like this:



Yes, poster, the entire reason I have been living as a man for the past seven years and the reason there is an "influx" of people like me is because society has made me feel unhappy with myself as a "woman."

It's not like being a transman has subjected me to intense scrutiny of my body as it relates to my gender identity, that's something that clearly only happens to cis women or as you call them "bio-girls."  Clearly the "influx" of transmen isn't because we ever lacked visibility and resources like the Internet, this is all happening right now because otherwise cis people would have known about it because cis people are experts on trans people and why we are the way we are.  I know this because cis people tell me so.  I don't know anything about myself until it's told to me by a cis person.

Things cis people don't have to think about...

A couple friends of mine were recently complaining about how uncomfortable and undignified people consider the new TSA procedures including full-body "naked" scanners and invasive pat-down procedures that involve touching the breasts, groin, buttocks, and other areas most of us consider private.  They said that we are all comfortable with this around doctors, so why not around TSA employees?

If you think like this, stop.

It's very easy to say things about how people are making their own naked bodies too big a deal when their bodies are considered "normal" by most society.  Those of us who use prosthetics or body shapers have a very different set of problems than you do.  They already made this breast cancer survivor take out her prosthesis, which is a standard part of the procedure.  I'm just waiting for them to ask a transman to whip out his prosthetic penis to subject to explosive testing.  Wouldn't that just be good times?  You could just decide not to wear it that day, but that's its own can of worms as you walk through the scanner or subject to their grope test and they notice something is amiss.

All over something that makes your flight only marginally safer than it was before.

But no, we're all just naked under our clothes, why should we worry about that sort of thing?  Because clearly my body is everyone's business.

Also, the NCTE has an article detailing what trans people need to know about the new TSA procedures which is worth a read if you fly a lot or plan on flying in the near future.

I have an oppressor complex the size of Alaska.

Milwaukee Pridefest, 2008

The amount of space dedicated to the interests of transmen as transmen is necessary.  We deserve the right to identify ourselves, we deserve the right to determine our own needs, we deserve the right to space, and we deserve the right to exist.

It's taken me years to be comfortable with saying this.  Because, due to the crowd I was allying with during my first run through college, I was internalizing the belief that because I was entering manhood, I was an oppressor whose role in that environment was to unquestionably accept critiques regarding my identity as a man.

So if transmen were forming their own groups because we felt unwelcome or unheard at mixed trans groups, it was because transmen were transmisogynists.  If we were uncomfortable with Dr. Alan Hart or Brandon Teena being portrayed as lesbians, it was because we were homophobic.  If there were fewer butch women in the world, it was because we were luring them into transgenderism.  If we got excited about our surgeries or the effects our hormones were having on us, we were devaluing women's bodies.  If we considered ourselves fully a member of our lived gender, we were being binary-enforcers and demeaning genderqueer people.

Being surrounded by the vocal minority that says things like this, it hard for me to remember that I had important problems, too.

To the gay guys who apparently think I'm hot. Or not.

This is actually going to address two topics at once.  Why?  Because I'm a multitasker and because sometimes being put through awkward life experiences give me inspiration.  Today's topic is gay guys.  Two kinds of gay guys, actually.  The first are gay guys who seem unable to keep their mouths shut about how unattractive they consider me because I'm a transman.  The second are gay guys who seem to wind up with major identity crises because they do consider me attractive and never, ever thought they would feel that way about a transman.

First, a story.  I am, thank Gods, not on the market right now because I am expecting my physical transition to begin soon and I feel with nearly superstitious fervor that this is something I need to go through by myself as it is a major rite of passage into manhood.  But if I were on the market, or simply stating how I felt about somebody, there are several things I consider unattractive.  Male bodybuilders.  People who weigh over fifty pounds more than me.  People more than four years younger or five years older than me.  Really skinny people.  Republicans.  I don't care about what genitalia one possesses or one's gender identity, most of the time, but there are plenty of people there who I simply consider unattractive.  In fact, I only consider maybe half of the people I meet attractive, and of those I am only attracted to maybe ten percent of them.  So I'm not particularly bothered by the fact that there are gay guys out there who need their dates to have dicks.  You're no shallower than I am.

But every time you go out of your way to inform me that you don't want me because you are gay, I consider laying out a frank list of all the reasons I consider you unfuckable.  Not because you aren't attracted to me, but because I am sick to death of the stunning level of ignorance involved for you to actually say something like this.

Good luck, Kye Allums

Kye Allums - gwsports.com

You've probably already heard the news.  The NCAA now has its first openly trans member, FTM Kye Allums, who plays for George Washington State and will be allowed to continue playing on the women's team so long as he is not on testosterone.  He is currently a recipient of a scholarship dependent on playing women's basketball.

I get uncomfortable about this sort of thing, and initially I was uncomfortable with this, too.  I think too many transmen have a sense of entitlement when it comes to women's space.  Then I realized I was in the closet working for the Girl Scouts in a female-only position for three years, so hey, hello hypocrisy.

Introductory Post - Jack

Do you know what you're getting into?  Really?  Well, let's find out.

My name is Jack.  I am the benevolent dictator of this blog, which is currently set up as a blog by and for female-to-male transmen.  I'm currently on the look-out for other transmen to contribute, so hopefully we can make something special.